Him: I am the soup ladle, I am the honeycomb.
Me: What did you just say?
Him: I lord, you lay.
Me: Dude, relax.
Him: I see the black vultures, hovering. You own the dirt.
Me: Can you just shut up for a minute? There are a lot of good looking chicks around.
Him: I am the sea snail, I am [...]
Archive for February, 2009
Just Another Conversation With Myself
Posted in Conversations with Marty, tagged secret friend, stream of consciousness on February 22, 2009 | 3 Comments »
The Dark and the Prurient — Part 2
Posted in Shorts, tagged hell, short story, westerns on February 20, 2009 | 3 Comments »
“Then I got off the train in Onion Springs. A beautiful little outpost in the rolling hills,” said Curio. “It was so beautiful that for a while I thought I could make myself a life there, a normal life. Until I met this family of wonderful girls.”
LeDarre stirred and lifted his head. His sleepy eyes [...]
The Dark and the Prurient
Posted in Shorts, tagged hell, short story, westerns on February 16, 2009 | 2 Comments »
This is part one in a two-part story.
They were stranded alone on an alien plain, dust in their eyes, sand in their boots. LeDarre, rail thin and dressed in black, loomed tall among the stone pillars that made up this land. And Curio, fat and snake-eyed, shambling between shadows as though attempting to avert the [...]
An Incident From the Past
Posted in Rants, tagged Dream, Isanity on February 16, 2009 | 4 Comments »
Why why why oh why why why oh why? Her ass sways in that skirt. It’s too big, but I still like it. I want to sink two big incisors in it and hold on, lock my jaw. Maybe smile for a little while. There is still a way to get back to normal playboy [...]
Friday the 13th: 13 Faces
Posted in Crossovers, tagged Friday the 13th, Jason Voorhees on February 13, 2009 | 1 Comment »
Read my tribute to the horror series that never gets old and never dies.
13 Stars of Friday the 13th
And check out this Jason Voorhees artwork by Nat Jones, a talented artist with a resume that reeks of Spawn, 30 Days of Night and Rob Zombie’s The Nail.
Now that is some evil shit.
Quick Hitters: H.P. Lovecraft and Ogre
Posted in Musings, tagged Cthulhu, HP Lovecraft, Ogre on February 12, 2009 | 1 Comment »
Was there ever any doubt at all that this guy…
…would live a fucked up life and end up writing some of the sickest fiction of the 20th Century? Both his parents died in an insane asylum and little H.P. grew up sickly and frail. He dropped out of school and had recurring night terrors his [...]
Truth and Fiction
Posted in Snippets, tagged conspiracy on February 9, 2009 | 3 Comments »
Over the past few years, a lot of speculative readers have asked me to confirm the veracity of the yarns I’ve spun. They question my honesty. They accuse me of embellishment and fraud. A poor excuse for gonzo journalism, they say. Well, I am here to assure you, loyal friends, that I do not lie. [...]
Is the End Really Nigh?
Posted in Musings, tagged Depression, Economy, Total Recall on February 8, 2009 | 4 Comments »
In the absurdly violent and thoroughly enjoyable sci-fi movie Total Recall, the leader of the rebel resistance on planet Mars was a parasitic alien called Kuato. A brilliant military strategist and philosopher, the 23-inch Kuato captured the hearts and minds of the disenfranchised Martians he championed. Of course, lost in the charisma and aura of [...]
Have We Not Met Before, Madame?
Posted in Soliloquy, tagged first post on February 6, 2009 | 3 Comments »
Two years ago, in accordance with star lore, give or take an arcsecond, this translucent vessel made a departure of sorts, widening the old holographic lens, as they say in some further parts, and giving up comfy terra firma in favor of the cold reaches of space. As you may come to see, on some [...]
Sum Freakness
Yesterways
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Recent Evil
Break Yoself
